Today, I reflected on a Women’s Conference organised by Terrieann Charles in 2018. She allowed me the wonderful opportunity of singing a song with my guitar; it was a new song I wrote which I thought was really fitting for the occasion. It was a great event. As I looked at one of the pictures taken at the event, I found myself missing my guitar all over again.
Not too long before that event, I found myself desperately yearning to play my guitar and sing, so much that I thought you know what, I would purchase a cheap guitar and start working on improving my guitar skills until I can obtain a better one. This was after years of thinking, one day, one day I would start again. I struggled with the thought before actually finding a way to buy one. I remember paying just about EC$400.00 for a new guitar. Nothing fancy.
On purchasing my guitar, I started my new project, identified a tutor on YouTube that I connected with and started on my revived journey of improving my skills. This however was short-lived. About eight months after, my guitar fell and broke. To date, I have not been able to have it fixed to the point where it can be effectively used again. I felt terrible, confused and angry. It felt as If I had literally thrown away four hundred dollars.
I had a brief moment of asking myself why as it didn’t make sense that my passion for playing my guitar and singing continued to burn within me and when I finally found a way to do something about it, the rug was heartlessly pulled from under my feet. I felt defeated and discouraged.
Now, mentally there is a slight fear that if I invest in another guitar I may loose it as well; it’s a struggle that feels like a battle between giving up and persevering what seem to be a worthwhile venture, a dream that I can’t let go even if I wanted to.
Over the Christmas holidays, as I continued to long for my guitar I felt inspired by my Mom as she shared her decision to start again. You see my Mom always had an interest in playing the piano. As a young adult she learned to play a little and through-out her life she stopped and started again. Now at 81 she has started again. She has her music sheets and her keyboard and sets out to practice a few minutes every day. I was inspired and said to myself, “Don’t give up”!.
I think it is sad when people give up on their dreams, as small as they may be. I know of great singers who hardly ever sing, individuals who are skillful at playing an instrument and have stopped playing. Many have given up on the opportunity of exploring a God-given gift, a passion or an interest. Sadly, though, they often look back and regret it.
My advice to you is if you are convinced that as you get older you would regret not starting again, you should start again. Put aside 15 minutes every day to practice or to work on developing your skill. It may be singing, sewing, knitting, playing the piano or the trumpet or some other instrument. The fact that the interest and the potential to get better still occupies a place in your heart is reason enough to start again.
As the new year draws closer, I hope that you would resolve to “starting again” as many times as is necessary.
I may not feel or be able to persevere a new guitar at the moment but I am 100% confident that I must! It is just something I have to do! I can tell it is part of my purpose.
I inspire you to start again! You would be happy you never gave up.